Monday, August 29, 2005

I Hate My Life !!! Do I ?

Hmmm... sigh...! hate it...! ohwww...! why...? how come...? how could it be...? why me...?
These words above were something I always thought in my mind... why you ask...? Continue reading please...

It's started on the month of February, one day, while I'm checking my old friendster account (jason_chong89@hotmail.com) suddenly, in my aleart box, saw the word ' friends request '. Happily, I click it and see who wanted to add me. A guy name Ryan, age around 18 or 19, staying in ss 19 added me and he had also sent me a message... asking to be friend. Okay, I'm happy whenever I know someone out there wanna know me as I'm not that 'well-known' in real life...(or mybe because i'm irritating or... nevermind, skip that part). We chat alot in msn and suddenly, one day he said "I love you" and he really mean it !!! Although he is quite handsome but how can I say yes la ??? Sokk I rejected him and ask him that just to be friends, can be a close friend but not love partner. *For that whole following month, no more message from him*

But on the day he stop messaging me... nightmare started !!! My handphone kept on rang no matter sms or calling. Pick up the phone... the person on the other end will start a conversation with :" Are you Jason Chong? I'm *whoever* that chatted with you *whenever*,do you still remember me?"

Surely no, I didn't online that few days and how could I chat with you people? Asking them where "I" chatted with them and mostly answered "MIRC" (according to my friends, MIRC is a chatting room or some sort of a website for people to chit-chat with other people). "Sorry, I don't know what website is that and I don't go into that chatting room." I answered nervousely.

For the whole month, phone calls for me, luckily I had just change my phone number and I'm using it alone, without sharing with my sister or mummy... otherwise...*die* Guess what? the maximum phone call I can get a day is 5 calls from 5 different people.

One month later, message from a 'long-time-no-see' friend~~Ryan. His message is very very very weird !!! Read this, it's something like that:

"Hey Jason, I guess you had know a lot of people and I hope that you had did something with them."
"What on earth...?" I asked myself... it's very obvious that he is the one who played me.
I asked him :" Did you do that to me...? Why ?
He replied :" Because you don't like me, and this is my revenge on you."
"What the hack...?"
I kept begging him not to do that anymore because that erally causing me trouble. I have to kept on sms them(those people who called) and explain as I don't want perople say Jason is a bad person. You know what he say?? You know what he request for? The thing he wants from me is too much, tooooo much !!! I can't stand it... He wanna have s** with me in order to delete or not using it. Surely answer no, I rejected him telling him one last time that not to imitate me anymore and did not care about him anymore.
Things after a few week is herrible. He hacked my account no matter msn or hotmail. Causing me lotta trouble. Now, (according to the people who called) he make lotta gay profile for me. "Facep****" "AXC***" and more... all this is just the website's name but I don't want you guys to go in... lol
Now overall, I got +-35 guys called me before... mostly not keep in touch already. I felt sorry to them as I ignore them... I don't like being ignore and now I ignore them. I can see that they are surely hurt that I ignore them. I"M SORRY !!! Really sorry. I know how they are feeling now but what can I do ? So sorry~~
* Just some notice for you guys out there. In my opinion, gays and lesbian is nothing as that is their life, or maybe they are born like that. It's just like you and me that we think we are normal, they think that they are normal as well. What can you do if you are born out like that ? Nothing !!! So, please be open-minded and accept them just like you accept us that you feel normal.
** Another notice for some of my school (a group of) form 5student this year (2005). Please, don't think that I'm a gay boy. Don't use that stupid and abnormal eyesight to look at me. I don't like that feel. In fect, it's non of your business if I'm really a gay. I will not harm you right? Girls should be feel more save with a gay actually as they know that they will not harm you, in the same time, guys are suppose to be more afraid la... so think la... Although I'm not but still hope you guys can take it like normal thing.They are just a normal human-being that need their own special life so accept them la. I did accept... do you?
*** I just wanna share some of my exprience here with you guys but not to get insult by you guys.
More than 30 people called.
Oldest ---> 46 years old.
Farest ---> Singapore.
Q : I'm having some special experience here... why do I look happy?
A : It's because I can't do anything already, so I just have to accept the fact with an open-minded.
Okay? Open up your mind and go !!! In fact, the reason I put " I hate my life" is to attract you to view this article... hehe...lol
**** Oh yea, I wanna say sorry to you guys also as my wording is soooooo small... I did it purpousely... as I don't want my mom or whoever to see this... I mean if she wanna check my blog she will just ignore this part because the wording is so damn small... haha... Sorry again !!! Enjoy reading :p
~JASON CHONG JIA JUN~

6 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

my best advice to you is to stop talking to this ppl and ask the Lord Jesus Christ to help you..i know no one else that can help,except Him =)

2:38 AM  
Blogger The O.F. Kiddo said...

Yes, thank you for your advice 'anonymous' but why don't you tell me who are you... is it better to let me know ?? Thanks again.

7:48 AM  
Blogger kimsng said...

i agree wif wat anonymous say 100%.only Jesus can help cos well i oso hv secrets n He help me solve it.i noe u r not a christian(i wasnt too last time) but just try asking Him cos Jesus promise He will help any1 who asks.n dont worry i will still be ur friend no matter wat happens whether u r gay or not.as u said,being wif a gay for girls is suppose to feel more 'safer'.but remember that homosexuality is a sin it should not use as an excuse like "i was being born that way" cos no one is.go check up my blog la dik.

12:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

sorry but i cant reveal myself..i will,in due time..we all have problems,its jus that yours is much bigger..but then again, Jesus can only save you..in the Bible, there is a story about a leper (penyakit kusta) its a sickness that wil eat up your nerves and then make part of your bodies drop..plus, anyone that goes near him/her wil be hit by the sickness too..now when the lepers came and ask Jesus to help them, He did not run away because he was afraid of the sickness..instead He healed them! if only you believe that He can help this "sickness", then only you can be healed..dont think that this is jus a fairy tale, this actually happened in the past and we have evidence..i trully hope that you can undo this by making the right choice..i'll pray for you

6:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

best regards, nice info »

8:30 PM  
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