Jokes~

Laughter is indeed the best medicine, and I hope my blog will be full of laughter. All negative things will be covered by the positives jokes... lame~

• Separate from his travel group in the Sahara Dessert, a tourist begged a passong nomad for water. "Sorry," said the tribesman. "I have no water, but I do have a selection of lovely ties for sale."
  "You must be crazy," the tourist replied. Close to death from thirst, he saw another nomad. "Water!" he gasped. "Give me some water."
  "Sorry, I have no water," came the reply, "only these handsome ties that I'd be glad to sell you."
  The tourist stumbled on until, to his astonishment, he saw a magnificent hotel far in the distance. Crawling at last into the lobby, he croaked, "Please give me water."
  "I'm sorry, sir," the doorman said. "We don't let anyone in without a tie." (J-S)
  
• Two cockroaches were munching on rubbish. "I was in that new restaurant across the street," said one. "It's so clean! The kitchen is spotless and the floor gleam. It's the most sanitary place I've ever seen."
  "Please," frowned the other cockroach. "Not while I'm eating!" (J-S)
  
• A sales manager complained to a colleague about one of his salesmen. "George is so forgetful it's a wonder he can sell anything. I asked him to get me a sandwich while he's out for lunch, but I'm not sure he'll even remember to come back."
  Just then the door flew open and in came George. "You'll never guess what happened," he exclaimed. "At lunch, I met the head of one of the biggest firms in the country. We got talking and he gave me an order worth $15 million!"
  "See'" said the sales manager. "I told you he'd forget the sandwich." (J-S)
  
• On his first day, a newcomer to prison heard the other inmates roar with laughter each time one of them called out a number. Mystified by this, he asked his cellmate what was happening. "We know all our jokes so well that, to save time retelling them, we've numbered them," he was told.
  Thinking he would join in, the newcomer shouted "208." To his amazement, the whole prison shook with laughter. The cellmate wiped tears from his eyes and commented, "We hadn't heard that one before." (J-S)
  
• A woman is sitting at a bar when a man approaches her and says, "Hi, sweetie. Want a little company?"
  "Why?" asked the woman. "Do you have one to sell?" (J-S)
  
• A male crab met a female crab and asked her to marry him. She noticed that he walked straight instead of sideways. Wow! She thought. This crab is really special. I can't help let him get away. So they merried immediately.
  The next day she was dismayed to notice her husband walking sideways like all the other crabs. "What's happened?" She sobbed. "You used to walk straight before we married."
  "Oh, darling," he said, "I can't drink that much every day." (J-S)
  

So, how was it? Funny or... ?

~JASON CHONG JIA JUN~