Malaysian style English and Britian English

Hahaha, was reading one mail from Adeline and saw this funny thing... Don't know how to explain so read it yourself la !



We (Malaysian) prefer to use short and easy to understand and not makepeople confused with 3 words instead of 10. We comfortable with short but not so polite, that is Malaysian style because English is not ourMother Language.English English vs Malaysian EnglishThe English did invent the English Language, but they cannot use iteffectively ( as few words as possible ) when communicating their intentions.Just compare these few phrases that Malaysians and Britians use to saythe same thing:

*Can't find a suitable size
Britons: I'm sorry, Sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.
Malaysians: No Stock!

*RETURNING A CALL...
Britons: Hello, this is John Travolta. Did anyone page for me a few moments ago?
Malaysians: Hallo, who page?

*Asking someone to make way.....
Britons: Excuse me, I'd like to get by. Would you please make way?
Malaysians: S-kews !

*WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY...
Britons: Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me.
Malaysians: No-need laaa.

*WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION...
Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?
Malaysians: (while pointing at door) Can or not?

*WHEN ASKING TO BE EXCUSED...
Britons: If you would excuse me for a moment, I have to go to the gents/ladies. Please carry on without me, it would only take a moment.
Malaysians: Toy lert, toy lert?

*WHEN ENTERTAINING...
Britons: Please make yourself right at home.
Malaysians: Don't be shy, ar!

*WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE...
Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.
Malaysians: Where got?

*WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER...
Britons: I'd prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.
Malaysians: Doe-waaaan.

*WHEN DECIDING ON A PLAN OF ACTION...
Britons: What do you propose we do now that the movie's sold out and all the restaurants are closed?
Malaysians: So how?

*IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION
Britons: Err. Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand whereyou'recoming from, but I really have to disagree with what you saidabout...
Malaysians: You mad, ha?

*WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE...
Britons: Excuse me, but could you please lower your voice,I'm trying to concentrate over here.
Malaysians: Shaddap lah!

*WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU...
Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for some time. Do I know you?
Malaysians: See what, see what?


So how is it ? What do you think ?

[J] A S O N -- Malaysian style English and Britian English